Speak to a professional

Understand more about what it will be like and how they help you to feel comfortable

It’s very normal to feel worried about speaking to professionals about personal things. This is even harder if you feel shame or guilt about your experiences.

Remember that specialist counsellors and advisers have had many years training and experience in helping men in your position.

In this video a counsellor addresses some of the most common concerns his clients have shared with him about deciding whether to speak to a professional. If you think that this could help you, click here to see where you can get free online counselling.

You may be concerned about how to take the first step to request support, or what it will be like during the meeting or video call. Particularly if you are not used to using technology.

This video shows an example of what the process is like at a counselling charity in Sussex. The process is likely to be very similar at your local organisation because they will follow similar protocols and work to the same professional standards.

Mankind is a charity based in Hove, in East Sussex, and we’re here to support people who have experienced sexual abuse, either as a child or an adult.

Our aim is to support people to reach the goals that they want to reach. Most people will come up with two or three things. It might be that they want to tell somebody if they haven’t told anyone before. It could be that they’re struggling at work or having difficulty with relationships and our aim over the six months that people are here is to work towards those goals.

Getting in touch with us is really easy. On our website there is a link called ‘access our services’. Mankind offers a one-to-one video call counselling service. It’s very easy to use. We’ll end you an email beforehand, you click on the link at the time of your counselling session. You’ll be able to see and hear your counsellor and they’ll be talking to you exactly as if they were sat in the chair opposite you.

You’ll have a one hour fixed time slot every week for 24 weeks. We have a team of counsellors and you can say your preference for the gender of counsellor you want.

Our services are free but we do welcome donations.

It’s good to prepare for an online counselling session. Try to be in a room that’s quiet, and where you can’t be overheard if that’s important to you. Have some water and tissues to hand as well.

In terms of set up, try not to sit in front of a window because it can be too bright for your counsellor to see you. If you need to adjust your screen at all, your counsellor can talk you through that.

Although the counselling slots are an hour, you might feel that that sounds like a long time and if you want to leave after a number of minutes that’s fine and you can do that at any time.

At Mankind, we don’t want people to feel alone with their experience and what’s happened to them. We want you to be able to come here, share your story and get the support you deserve.

"I was scared talking about it would make things worse but I'm so grateful now that I took the leap. I have learnt so much about myself and can honestly say that the decision to speak to a counsellor saved my life."

Eddie

Retired Teacher, Fisherman and Car Fanatic